My story consists of only one addiction – alcohol; I guess you could call me a “pure bread alcoholic”! I felt the need to experiment with hard core drugs like coke, meth or heroin. I was always scared of them, knowing how addicted to alcohol I was I did not want to be addicted to coke, meth or heroin.
On most occasions, I felt left out when attending AA meetings; these days most of the individuals present at meetings seem to suffer from drug addiction in conjunction with their addiction to alcohol. I felt as if I had to create stories involving drug use in order to fit in at Alcoholics Anonymous. In the past few months, out here in LA, I have yet to attend an AA meeting where drugs were not part of someone’s story. To say that I am not annoyed by the fact that I cannot seem to find a true AA meeting, is an understatement! It becomes bothersome, especially when someone comes up to me, asking “what my drug of choice”; when I reply, stating that alcohol was my only addiction, they reply with “that’s it”? What else do I have to prove to feel welcomed – does not AA stand for Alcoholics Anonymous.
Being the pure alcoholic that I am, pushes me to feel either one up or one down depending on the situation – one up when I say to myself “well at least I wasn’t a drug addict”, and one down when someone tells me “you only drank alcohol”? I can easily see how an individual, walking into AA today, would feel as if they were not qualified to be in the rooms.
You hear stories about crystal meth binges and hooking for heroin or other such narcotics; very little is said about alcohol – other than saying it was what got them started. Certain people say that Marijuana is the “gateway” drug – I believe this to be factual, however others believe that alcohol cannot be constituted as an actual “drug”, but a doorway to more hard core substances such as meth or heroin.
I am of the belief that addicts who identify as actual “drug addicts” should attend NA or other narcotic based meetings in order to discuss their substance abuse issues! When I go to AA I expect to hear about alcohol abuse – not heroin or meth abuse.
In the big book there is no other drug mentioned besides that of alcohol. In the beginning of AA the meetings were solely based on alcohol abuse, and sharing about alcohol related topics. That is the way meetings should run now. I equate it to walking into an Overeater’s Anonymous meeting and only sharing about alcohol abuse and only touching on over eating. Or it’s like going to Chick-fil-a and ordering a big-mac – it just doesn’t make sense!!
My hope is that AA turns into what it was made for and that was to share about alcohol and not about other drugs.