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Top Drug-related Stories of 2012


From face-eating cannibals to disgraced athletes, 2012 was an exciting and tragic year for drug-related news.  Here are the top five stories related to the subject.


1.  Face-Eating Zombie Attack

Our first and most delicious story of 2012 happened on May 26th when Rudy Eugene, having suddenly developed a voracious appetite for human flesh, was found under a Miami highway eating another man’s face off.  That man, 65 year-old Ronald Poppo, survived the horrific attack after losing 80 percent of his face to Eugene’s mouth.  Police responded to the attack, immediately taking down Eugene with a hail of gunfire.  At first many people believed that the “zombie-like” killer had committed this tasteless act due to the effects of bath salts but the autopsy report showed that he was just really, really, really high on plain old marijuana.

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2.  Whitney Houston

On February 11, 2012, the iconic superstar singer, Whitney Houston, 48, was found unconscious in her suite at the Beverly Hilton Hotel, submerged in the bathtub and later pronounced dead at 3:55 p.m. after numerous failed attempts to save her life with CPR.  Her death was ruled an “accidental drowning” but later officials disclosed that “effects of atherosclerotic heart disease and cocaine use” also played a role in her demise.  Toxicology reports also revealed additional drugs in her system, including Xanax, Benadryl, Flexeril, and marijuana.

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3.  Lance Armstrong

One of the more shocking stories of this year was Lance Armstrong’s exile from the sport of competitive cycling, losing seven Tour de France titles and all of his prize winnings due to prolonged steroid use while contending.  The former no. 1 ranked cyclist in the world, who inspired millions after overcoming testicular cancer to win his first Tour de France title in 1999, has denied all charges of doping.  However, in August 2012, Armstrong threw in the towel in his fight against the United States Anti-Doping Agency, deciding not to contest their charges.

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4.  Legalization of Marijuana in Colorado and Washington

On October 6th, every stoner in Colorado and Washington grabbed their Lays potato chips and Cheetos—not to mention their pipes—and celebrated the news that marijuana is now legal everywhere in both states.  Before the initiatives in each state were passed by voters in November’s elections, only medicinal marijuana was legal.  While the possibility remains that these policies will be challenged by the federal government, the winds of change seem unstoppable as the American public continues to lose faith in the decades-long War on Drugs.

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5.  Roger Clemens Acquitted

Our last story of 2012 is a home-run, to say the least.  In 2010, 49 year-old Roger “The Rocket” Clemens, the seven-time Cy Young winner, was charged with one count of obstructing Congress, three counts of making false statements, and two counts of perjury in the case of his alleged steroid use during his baseball career.  But on June 18th, to everyone’s surprise, Clemens was acquitted of all charges, saving the pitcher from 30 years in the pen (and we’re not talking about the bullpen).   While the 300-game winner won’t be spending the rest of his life in prison, he may end up spending the rest of his life denying charges he used performance-enhancing drugs.  He is eligible for election into the Baseball Hall of Fame in 2013 and few believe he will be elected on his first ballot.

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Filed under: Alcohol and Drugs, Celebrity News · Tags: Alcohol and Drugs, Bath Salts, Benadryl, cannibalism, doping, Flexeril, Lance Armstrong, marijuana, Marijuana Legalization, performance enhancing drugs, pot, Roger Clemens, Ronald Poppo, Rudy Eugene, steroids, Tour de France, United States Anti-Doping Agency, Whitney Houston, xanax

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