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Serene With Serenity

 

One of my favorite lines concerning serenity is in Step Three, page 41, of the 12&12 that states, “In all times of emotional disturbance or indecision, we can pause, ask for quiet, and in the stillness simply say: ‘God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can, and wisdom to know the difference. Thy will, not mine, be done.’”

Before becoming a member of Alcoholics Anonymous, my life was full of absolute chaos.  Every day was filled with smoking pot and drinking; almost a fifth of liquor was in me by the end of every night.  I was an un-ashamed, irritable, bad-tempered, and angry son of a bitch to everyone in my life.  Most of my cruel behavior was directed towards the people who loved and cared for me the most; my parents and sister.  When I hurt people, I’d say I was sorry but hours or even minutes later I came right back with even more atrocious words and actions.

I almost lost it all; my friends, my family, and most importantly my life.  I was dying.  My body was giving up on me.  Through the love of my parents who intervened and pleaded with me to go to rehab, I was given a chance to see the light of what life had to offer; a way out of my misery; an existence worth living and living it to the fullest.  I was given a way to gain my serenity back and to learn how to embrace it.

A lot of my serenity and humility comes from exactly what the prayer states, understanding and accepting that some things cannot and will not ever change and that I will have the courage to change the things I can.  When my head tells me absolute junk about someone or something, I have to constantly say the Serenity Prayer over and over again to get through it.  I am one very stubborn guy who likes to get his way a lot of the time, and the most helpful thing I can do is accept that I have no power over people, places and things.

Today, my life is more peaceful and I live with a sense of calmness which I never or consciously thought I could have.  Through working the Twelve Steps with a sponsor and taking it one day at a time, I have learned to live with the utmost serenity, fully embracing this way of life.

 

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Filed under: Recovery, Spirituality · Tags: 12-steps, alcohol, Alcoholics Anonymous, Courage, family, friends, health, humility, Illness, People Places Things, pot, Recovery, rehab, serenity, Serenity Prayer, Spirituality, sponsor, Treatment, weed, wisdom

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