Things to be Grateful For
The obvious things we should all be grateful for is shelter, food, the opportunity to change our lives, our loved ones and the fact that things can always be worse.
I know at my worst moments, excluding life threatening situations, I always laugh thinking to myself, things cannot get any worse, and things do get worse.
The night that most comes to mind when I think about this is in college when it took me from 2am from 7am to get home from New York City to Long Island. I was so incoherently high and drunk that I had no concept of how to get home and toward the end of the trip after getting lost and spending all my money on lost train fare I eventually had to beg cab drivers to take me home, penniless.
It is always hard for me to come up with a gratitude list especially when I am in the worst mood, which is when it has been suggested to me that I initiate the process of making a gratitude list. I am angry with life, with the way everything is going and I am too far gone in self pity mode loving every second of it that I truly do not want to think about the things in my life that make my life better.
I am having one of those days today, just a complaining, whining mood where I refuse to look at the positive. My decisive reason to make a gratitude list and possibly help someone change his or her moods when feeling crabby.
The things that help me become more relaxed are warm baths, soothing music, crispy rice squares from coffee bean and mostly laughing. If I really have it in me I will attempt my own form of meditation, which includes paying attention to the details of the moment, usually outside in nature. The BEST thing for a cynical antsy mood is going to the gym, and I am very grateful I have a job that can pay for my gym expenses.
Even in sobriety there is the daily BS, and sometimes it can get to anyone.
Any sober person in the program will give you ONE piece of advice without fail EVERY TIME, which is just as irritating when you are in one of those moods.
“Go be of service to someone else”. The point being this act will get you outside of your own head.
It get’s difficult in sobriety to deal with self-pitying, restless and/or irritable moods.
Because us addicts and a piece or a pipe or a pint in order readily to not deal with those moods.
Now we have to help people and think about what we are grateful for.
And personally that is hard for me when I am stuck in a cynical mood.
These moods come up often especially in early recovery.
It is common in every recovery center at the end of the day everyone gathers around to reflect on his or her day what he or she did the best, what they could have done better and what they are grateful for.
So the solutions in AA to get out of those moods are bountiful: helping others, making a gratitude list, taking contrary actions, doing estimable acts i.e. making your bed, doing your dishes or paying that time warner cable bill. It’s simple; the act that is hard is to be willing to actually do it. It’s okay to not be perfect. I have been feeling really down just today and have gotten some advice from friends.
And quote
“Don’t be so hard on yourself. You’re amazing and life is difficult and sometimes we annoy ourselves because we never get a break. But it’s ok. Its like what the old woman said in ‘parenthood’, life is a roller coaster”
“Someone once told me “never let them see you frown, I smile on my off days”
complaining doesn’t help. Just go through life. And everything worthwhile takes time. It will come.”
I was even reading famous quotes on life last night to get to a better place in my head. Changes of scenery, change of people in your life, all of these things are necessary for a piece of mind. You create your own world, so it’s no wonder all my phone numbers were accidentally wiped from my phone today; I have been in a negative space attracting negative things. Sometimes I forget to realize that “This too shall pass” and that I have an abundance of potential. I have to remember it’s okay to not be perfect. Yet, not to be short of my best
Sometimes it sucks that we don’t have drugs to escape this feeling, yet the feeling of not being a slave to substances and having other coping mechanisms is truly brilliant and possible. Yet, you and I are all human beings who go through the daily BS and it’s okay to feel that way, as long as we do not get so involved in our self pity because we have provided actions to change our way of thinking and acting.
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Filed under: Recovery, Spirituality · Tags: grateful, gratittude
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